Well I've just managed to tick one thing off of the supposed big tick list of life. I'm married. That is correct I have found someone that loves me enough to commit to creating a whole new family that is separate of a their family of origin. I have new allegiances. Marriage is such a complex and wonderful thing it's hard to explain exactly what it means after you've been co-habiting for several years. Though for us Victor and I there certainly seems to be a new found desire to collaborate on a deeper level to find ways to create the lives that we want and build a path towards something that holds deeper meaning for both of us.
It's wild that one might even have to decide or declare this at the start of the marriage as it seems like such a normal place to be. However having already been in this relationship for seven years I know how easy it is to loose your way of forget the agreement that you made way back at the beginning of love. The truth is that you have to make far more compromises than any strong independent person might want to in order to be in the relationship. Apparently there are no deal breakers, farting in bed, to addiction, to destructive patterns are all allowed for. The blessing of the compromise is the love that shines through the cracks. The deep truth of "I love you no matter what". It's quite a place to find yourself. It's also a wonderful place to share with someone who feels the same.
